The Green-Eyed Monster. I've been doing a lot of reflecting on my jealousy in the last couple of weeks. I'm extremely grateful to have such an honest and caring husband who helps me figure things out about myself in order to allow me to work on those things. Recently, I straightforwardly asked him why he thought I might be so competitive. I always want to be better than others, particularly girls. Without hesitation, he answered that it's probably because my low self esteem. I was so shocked that this was so obvious to him! After thinking about it for awhile, though, I realize he is completely right. Does that make me any less jealous? Not particularly, although I'd like to be.
1) This is just mean sometimes! I don't want to lose friends over something like this!
2) It's just time consuming! For example, if I'm going out with friends, it already takes long enough to get ready, but then to try to make sure I look my best in order to not look absolutely horrendous next to the pretty girl going out with us (even if it IS a good friend) takes a lot of time and effort!
My friend *J* is the sweetest girl ever...we met in college and I love that girl to death. She has been working on weight loss so hard! Just today, she posted that she has gone from a size 13/14 to a size 6/8!!! Wow!!! She moved out of state, started a new job and LOST weight instead of gaining it like a lot of people would. And not only lost weight, but lost A LOT of weight! That girl is amazing! So thankfully my first reaction was sincere PROUDNESS. I know how hard it is to lose weight, but she's been going to the gym and watching what she eats - everything. After a minute or two, I got jealous, though. Ugh...horrible jealousy! Why can't I get these results, too! I've been working so hard! But I know she's been working MUCH HARDER than I have - going to the gym all the time, working with a personal trainer, etc. - so she deserves those results
110%. So, my love, I'm sorry that my jealousy came out (even though you don't know about it 'til now ;), and I'm so happy for you and proud of you, and I hope you realize that!!
So I went to talk to my husband about this, and he had quite a few things to say to me about the topic, and about me losing weight slowly. Then I talked some more to my lovely friend Janet who has ALWAYS been there for me even when I was a chubby chubster. She's always suggesting new ideas to me for anything with which I need help. So after our talk, I think I'll be switching up the exercise a little bit. I'll for sure be adding in some weights after the walking. So hopefully I'll be able to keep on trucking until I get to my finish line!
And after all of that, I'll let you know that the number this morning was... 232.9.
Am I EVER going to get out of the 230s?!?!?! It seems like it's taking forever!
I've also been in search of some new foods since I've been making a lot of the same things lately. Hubby and I have been very happy with a new pizza recipe. We use Flat-outs and reduced fat cheese. I've been putting mushrooms and turkey pepperoni on mine. Yumm! I also made a new soup with green beans, potatoes, ham and water. The batch makes about 10 servings that are only 3 points plus each!!! For a long time, I usually have split up crackers, chips, etc. into 1 serving size bags at the beginning of the week, but I've recently been doing that with our grapes, too. I'm so grateful, because those things take forever!
Well, off to do more laundry!
Much Love!
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