The strangest feeling & Baring my soul

Of all of my friends who I know read this blog, I don't know if any of you at all will be able to understand what I'm about to tell you.  I very, very rarely get full.  I don't feel full.  I can eat 1/2 a large pizza, 1/2 an order of breadsticks, and a dessert and still probably be able to stuff more food in.  It sucks.  It's part of how I got where I am today, but it's one of the feelings I acknowledge I have to overcome.  Life has been nicer now that Bob knows about this.  He knows that I will eat at a restaurant and need to eat again an hour later.

The time has come though, friends.  I have been full not once, not twice, but THREE times in the last 2 days.  THREE TIMES!  What the heck happened?!  It's absolutely amazing!  The feeling of not wanting, not "NEEDING" to eat.  It's amazing!  Do not take this for granted, my friends!  The amazing, wonderful, source of this fullness?!  SHAKEOLOGY!  I have loyally been having 1 shake a day, partly because I wanted to stick with it, partly because I already have about 2 months of shake already bought, and partly because I haven't even tried Chocolate yet.  Example 1 of being full (easily one of the top 10 moments of my life).  I was eating lunch today.  In case you're interested, I'm going to tell you about my sandwich, because it was amazing.  I don't remember the last time I had a sandwich on regular bread.  Sandwich thins all the way!  I'm a carb girl, but if it's not good bread, then sandwich thins are the boss.  So I took those sandwich thins and spread a little bit of laughing cow spreadable cheese on each bun (the flavor was Sundried tomato & basil in case you're interested).  I then put some turkey on it and some Fakon.  If you haven't tried Fakon, I love it.  It's microwaveable bacon that's not that high in points.  (Keep in mind I'm obviously still not eating the healthiest of meals that I strive for someday).  But I ate this sandwich and a handful of grapes.  I realized I had about 10 minutes left in lunch and I should eat something else.  I looked in my lunch for what I should eat next, and it hit me (this was the 3rd sensation in 2 days).  I was full again!  I didnt want any more food.  The thought of putting more food in my mouth made my stomach hurt.  It was amazing!  I wanted to dance to my next class! (But my ass still hurt from the workout this morning, so I couldn't dance up the stairs). So, my friends.  I'm not the biggest person on trying to sell things.  If I don't like it, I don't like it.  But for me to be full means that they must be doing SOMETHING right!

Anyway...I thought it was hard enough to reveal my actual weight on here, but now that that's over, it really wasn't that bad.  No, nobody came up to me on the street yelling out the horrifying number and ran away laughing.  So, I've survived.  In starting Slim in 6 and Shakeology, along with a challenge group from my wonderful Beachbody coach, Kayla, it's come time that I finally measure myself again.

Measuring...oh, how I loathe thee.  It's not so much that the inches bother me.  I mean, obviously they do, but the scale bothers me more.  It's because I could measure myself and then do it again 10 seconds later and have a completely different measurement.  I need to get tattoos of where the measurements were taken.  It's just kinda ridiculous, so even if it says I've lost inches, I never know whether to believe myself or not.  The simplest ways I've found to do this are to 1)  Have someone else (Bob) measure me.  2)  Measure without clothes (hence Bob measuring me).  Also, I measure the waist right over my fake, surgically operated into place belly button.  That at least helps the waist measurement.  He says he remembers the rest, but we'll see how that turns out in ~30 days.

Anyway...baring my soul.  For ...well, I don't really know the exact reason I'm putting these numbers on here.  I guess it makes it a lot easier to talk about things and get them in the open.  So...
Chest - 51.5"  (honestly, I'm OK with that one...I'll take 50 inches of boob any day.  Just kidding.  Take away the back fat, please).
Waist - 52"
Hips - 53"
R Upper thigh - 29"
L Upper thigh - 28.5"
R Arm - 15"
L Arm - 14.5"

Grand total - 243.5"  Awesome.  Bright side?  The only way (hopefully) is down.

So, if you're laughing, that's OK. If your jaw dropped, that's OK.  I'm glad it's in your own home and not in public in front of me. :)

If you're telling me I can do it...openly or secretly cheering me on, praying for me, wishing and hoping that I can do it, that's OK too.  I believe I can do it.  I've gotten off track since I officially decided to change my life in January, but I've never once given up and said that I just couldn't do it.  I may not be my goal weight for my friends wedding, but I will be healthier, and eventually I WILL be happy with this body that God has given me!

Much Love!